Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
