I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
