I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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