Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
