why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
