I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize