How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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