she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
