I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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