You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
