just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Alive.
So much puke
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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