She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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