Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Randomize
