I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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