The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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