I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
