WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
