if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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