I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Randomize