if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Randomize
