Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
I woke up under a house in Key West
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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