I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
