You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Randomize
