I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
