I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
