So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
soo... how was my night?
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Randomize
