But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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