carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
We left an ass print on the piano.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
Randomize
