Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
