I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
