I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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