Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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