Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
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