do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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