It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
