quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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