I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
