Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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