I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Randomize
