@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
