You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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