dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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