what day is it and did you see me today?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
