That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
apparently i ate an entire bag of goldfish, kissed some guy with a girlfriend who now wants to kill me, made my sister sleep in my bed with me while i wore no pants, and told my whole family i am pregnant with jonny's devil baby...never drinking again
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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