how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
