My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
How does one acquire holy water?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
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