3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
