And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
