Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
Randomize
