bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
